Y don't U work abroad?
i was drinking tuba with some of the women and fisherfolks in one island barangay when one of my drinking friends asked me "so why do you stay here and not work abroad?"
i am asked this question too often.
my college friend once told me - "alam mo, hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit nagtitiyaga ka sa ganitong buhay...wala ka bang balak mag-abroad" (you know, I cannot understand why you have to endure this kind of life…don’t you have plans of working overseas?)
my former co-teacher asked - "bakit ka ba nagtitiyaga diyan sa trabaho mo eh puwede ka namang mag-abroad?" (why do you have to suffer that kind of work when you can always work overseas?)
my sisters tell me - "may, puwede ka namang mag-abroad anytime ah. ba't di mo gawin?" (you can work overseas anytime you want, why don’t you?)
my in-laws ask me - "wala ka bang balak mag-abroad?" (don’t you have plans of working overseas?)
so i ask myself - "wala nga ba akong balak mag-abroad?" (don’t I really have plans to work overseas?)
funny how i do a tunganga (literally, open mouthed) after asking myself this question...
funny how a part of me thinks i should work abroad to save for my children's education
funny how that part of me is saying that you don't get education in schools alone...that the exposure the kids get from going with me around samar is a great educational exercise
"wala nga ba talaga akong balak mag-abroad?"
but i have found my mission here...
i believe in finding one's own mission in life and pursuing that mission
i believe that finding one's mission defines one's happiness
and i am happy...
i have been happy for quite sometime...
actually since i came to samar...
since i started doing the rounds of the fishing and farming barangays
i get humbled when i compute people's monthly income during our livelihood planning exercises and realize that most of them earn roughly 1,7++ a month and yet they still manage to smile while computing with me...
i cried when i gave out my kids' old clothes to this family and heard their grandmother told the kids to fold them neatly so they can use them when they go to the city...
i cried harder when i heard that school children walk to school without breakfast and have to wait till lunch to eat...
i still cry...because there are still sob stories...
but how i would laugh
i laugh when i dance the cha-cha and the curacha in the barangays
i laugh when the waves hit the boat and mader beka starts to panic
i laugh when i drink tuba
i laugh after a successful meeting
i laugh when it rains while we are in the middle of the sea and we get wet
i laugh a lot...because there are also success stories...
so, wala nga ba akong balak mag-abroad?
wag muna ngayon... (not now…not yet)
marami pang dapat gawin... (there are still lots to do)
our Kenyan VSO volunteer once said - "but the very reasons for why you are working are sacrificed..."
he meant my kids...
my eldest wants to study in manila
he misses his old school...
he misses the fast life...
i just hope he understands in a short while...
i hope he appreciates the sun, the wind, not covered by smog
i hope he appreciates the sea, the sand, the waves...
i really hope he does...
i hope he gets educated by life, by experiences...
i hope he learns from people and the environment...
and enjoys while he learns...
i hope he does...
my youngest?
ah, well, he's still enjoying his feeling of being the baby in the family...
i just hope he stays happy...
i hope he learns...
and enjoys while he does...
i hope he does...
my soulmate?
love binds us. what more can i ask for...
i just hope he surrenders to his mission in life...
i hope he does...
funny how a write up about working abroad can end this way
ah, maybe, i just let my spirit be...
so do i have plans of going abroad?
if someone spends for my vacation, why not?
but to work?
ahhh, not yet
there are still things to do here...
people to meet...
missions to accomplish...
more happiness to feel...
but who knows? maybe when the kids become adults
me and soulmate can do missionary work...
where? abroad?
Written in August 2004, two months after the BIAGs arrived in Catarman, NS. Five years later, the author still feel the same. Happy-most of the time...insecure with the organizational budget-sometimes...Life is worth living : )
The kids are now happy too. Thank you. (Despite the brownouts :( no thanks to?)
Joelyn Biag
Executive Officer of SPPI
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